Biden To Labor Unions: Saving Bankers Saves You

In an epic win for Orwellian doublethink, mafia don Joe Biden told AFL-CIO union thugs that “most economists agree the year-old recovery act has saved or created at least 2 million jobs.”  Of course “most economists” does not include actual economists.

Banking on the fact that most AFL-CIO union thugs are idiots, Biden continued on “When you lose 8 million jobs in this Great Recession and you keep it from being 10 (million), that’s no solace to the 8 million who don’t have a job, man," Biden said. "We have to make this work. Too many people are in trouble in this country."

Biden acknowledged that Bankers were looting the union thugs blind, but stated union thugs who do grunt work should not be concerned about this.  Its all for the greater good.

he [Biden] knows a lot of people are frustrated that unemployment remains high, especially when banks who were bailed out by the federal government are handing out big bonuses to their executives.

"These guys are kicking in bonuses with numbers bigger than we can pronounce. More money in a bonus than we’ll make in our entire life. It’s no wonder people are concerned. It’s no wonder they wonder about the Recovery Act, but guess what? It’s breaking through, guys," Biden said.

After being reassured by the mafia don that they weren’t actually being looted by federal tyrants and bankers, the union thugs agreed to blindly support the administration policy of unhinged war, total tyranny, unending taxation, and massive transfers of wealth to the banking elite.

Union thug John “Big Shaft” Marcus commented “I don’t like bankers, but god damn it, if giving them 23.7 trillion is going to save my union job, then we have to do as the boss man says.”  Big Shaft then grumbled about the price of beer and the fact his favorite NBA team was on a losing streak.

Big Shaft’s children, who attend the John Maynard Keynes Academy of Excellence, agreed with Biden that an all powerful banking elite and State are required in order to provide jobs to people like their father, who would otherwise die from starvation in a state of total anarchy.

Cynthia Marcus, Big Shaft’s oldest child, stated “We all know that people like my father are too dumb to be responsible for themselves, therefore we must have an all powerful State to provide him a job digging ditches in Alaska.  I think its also clear that without an all powerful State, humanity would devolve into a state of total anarchy where roving bands of leather clad looters drive armored vehicles around in an apocalyptic wasteland robbing each other for fuel and scraps of food.”