7,000 People Threatened By Mafia In One Day

Fascist Soup has learned that nearly 7,000 American citizens were threatened by violent thugs running a mafia protection service in the state of Indiana the other day.

The mafia enforcers took the unusual step of conducting a massive collection campaign from their victims that unfolded over the course of a single day.  The massive issuance of threats against the public resulted in a stampede of victims rushing to pay off mafia enforcers in order to prevent the violence that was sure to follow if they didn’t cough up the cash.

The building in which the thugs had setup a base of operations was overwhelmed with victims who ended up being packed in like sardines as they begged not to be hurt while emptying their pocketbooks.

One victim was quoted as saying:

“I’m 77 years old. Why would you have a 77-year-old woman coming down here standing in line?” said Beulah Owens. “I just forgot to mail in my protection money. When you get old, you do these things.”

We here at Fascist Soup are glad that Mrs. Owens learned her lesson.  We would hate to see her get hurt.