Terrorist Organization Assaults Amish Farmers Over Milk Production

The criminal terrorist organization you call the FDA has decided that you are simply too stupid to know what’s best for you.  Accordingly, they have raided a completely peaceful Amish farmer for the heinous crime of selling raw milk to willing consumers.

You see, consumers might accidentally purchase raw milk, confusing it with highly modified, steroid ridden, pasteurized, homogenized, genetically altered regular milk produced by mega-corporate dairy conglomerates, which might put their lives in jeopardy based on research conducted back in the 1960s (which has never been subsequently verified).

In order to get around federal jurisdiction legalities, the terrorist organization purchased milk from the farmers who then shipped it across state lines.  This act gave the feds the authority to mount a 5:00 AM raid on the Amish farmers, who were subsequently traumatized by armed Stasi enforcers storming around their private property looking for anything they deemed to be unwholesome for you.

Chairman Mao warned us that “There is a serious tendency toward capitalism among the well-to-do peasants.”  It appears as if his prophecy has come to pass here in our criminal communist State.  Thank god the FDA is here to crack down on those who would make a living by providing products that people are voluntarily willing to pay for.

An officer demonstrates his lack of masculinity by drawing his weapon in fear of being attacked by raw milk wholesalers.

Raw milk distributors have a history of violent gang-like activity dating back to 10,000 B.C. when Ugma the goat farmer beat Bututu over head with a Woolly Mammoth thighbone for not paying his milk protection money. I can see why armed State agents were necessary in order take on the Amish mafia at 5:00 AM.