michaelsuede

Healthcare Tort Reform – The Simple Rational Solution

To my unwashed hordes, I present to you the most simple and elegant solution to the outrageous costs of medical malpractice insurance in the history of mankind. Tort reform would be unnecessary if contract law was actually followed by the courts. In a recentarticle where he argues for private courts to enforce and arbitrate malpractice…

Rand Paul vs. Stalinist Pig – Voter Fraud Runs Rampant

Rand Paul, a libertarian Republican, is currently running against the Stalinist pig, Secretary of State Trey Grayson, for the Kentucky Senate seat previously occupied by the Fascist Jim Bunning. Because the Stalinist pig is also the Secretary of State, the pig is responsible for over-seeing the election between himself and Rand Paul. The Ethics Commission…

Government Takes Accounting Tips From Enron

Since the vast majority of my blog readers are publik school graduates, I’m sure you are unaware of the accounting fraud that was Enron. Enron liked to buy up commercial properties around its energy plants using “special purpose vehicles,” which is a type of investment that allowed Enron to (fraudulently) keep its real debt off…

Overlords Create New Constitution To Enforce Obamacare

The Fascist Overlord John Conyers informed the serfdom yesterday that the Constitution has been updated in order to make Obamacare constitutional.  The legal debate had centered on whether or not the State can force a person to pay for health insurance. To address this issue, Conyers simply created a new clause to the Constitution on…

Government Saves Us From Pros

The citizens of Philadelphia spent untold thousands of dollars in legal fees, court costs, and police enforcement the other day in order to protect its citizens from the evil woman known as Susan Finkelstein. Finkelstein created a Craig’s List ad that offered sex in exchange for world series tickets. The City Mayor was quoted as saying: “This is a…

Armageddon Bunker For Sale – Utah

hmmmmm *ponders bank account* From BoingBoing “There are hidden caves which I will show to the new owner. These caves have not likely seen any humans besides myself and my boys.” “Plenty of hunting; there are deer, rabbit, and quail on our property every day.” “Step outside the front door and you can fire a…

NATO to Russia: We Like Drugs

The Ruskie drug czar is a tad upset with NATO because it continues to forge open alliances with the opium growers in Afghanistan. The Russians want the poppy fields sprayed to eliminate the heroine flowing into their country.  NATO, of course, thinks this is a horrible idea  - which, of course, means the US thinks…

Obama To Dems: You Are Too Dumb To Have Intelligence

hahaha I love the pun in my post title. Anywho – the Hill is reporting that the King of Transparency does not like transparency: House Intelligence Committee Democrats are engaged in a fierce showdown with the White House over lawmakers’ demands for more transparency and oversight of the intelligence community. President Barack Obama has twice…

CA Ballot Measure To Legalize Pot

The great fascist state of California is being pressured to engage in freedom.  I know, its a shocking state of events. Supporters of Marijuana legalization have managed to collect the necessary signitures to get the initiative on the November ballot.  They collected upwards of 500,000 signatures from every county in CA except Alpine. Polls are showing a slim…

Coffin placed on Carnahan's lawn

Politico reports: A coffin was placed on a Missouri Democrat’s lawn, another in a string of incidents against lawmakers after their vote Sunday on a health care overhaul. Rep. Russ Carnahan (D-Mo.) had a coffin placed “near his home,” a spokesman said Wednesday evening. What the article fails to mention is that it was actually…